There is some grammar I'd like to help correct here. The translation is still mostly complete, but it looks like a few misused words are up there.
In this case, should I add check_translation, try to point it out in a comment, fix it myself, or just leave it?
@Blindga Could you tell me what you find off? There were some parts I found iffy that I tried to convey the meaning to the best, but a second opinion is always helpful.
@Blindga Could you tell me what you find off? There were some parts I found iffy that I tried to convey the meaning to the best, but a second opinion is always helpful.
@zaregoto I did tweaking and polishing here and there. Let me know if you have any questions about my choices.
Translation update is better. It's far more wordy though, but I guess you would know if that gets the idea across better.
One last thing though, "boobs max <clause>" should be used. "Boobs maxes <clause>" is wrong subject-verb. The sentence is simple enough to still be understood, but this particular type of mistake is highly noticeable and extremely damaging to dialogue strength when it comes up in stories. It's unnatural even in casual speech.
I'm sure you know this of course, but both you and Zaregoto made the same mistake, so I thought I'd point it out just in case.
Translation update is better. It's far more wordy though, but I guess you would know if that gets the idea across better.
It now includes some words/phrases that the previous translation skipped, and one or two sentences simply require more words in English to express properly.
One last thing though, "boobs max <clause>" should be used. "Boobs maxes <clause>" is wrong subject-verb.
Yeah, I missed modifying that when I rephrased the sentence.
I like her slender shoulders and wrists.Things I like about Tenryuu Kai-NiI like how her hair is longer and she's become more feminine.The full view of her armpits due to her sleeveless shirt is super-erotic.The length of her legs, exceeding world class, is pretty.The skirt fitting tightly to her navel and crotch is very talented.I like how her massive boobs make her necktie dangle.The top seems warm enough that one could draw it even for her winter version.It's cute when girls wear thick platform shoes.I like how her massive boobs max out how her pockets dent into her.I like how she's gotten taller and looks cooler.I like her childbearing hips.I like her thighs being thicker than her head.I like soft-looking thighs that knee-socks dig into.I like her massive boobs that don't defy gravity.
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