This is by far, one of the most amusing quotes I've read in a while.
Counter impossible danmakus with cheating!!First time player going all out!!Play it properly, you damn Amanojaku contrarian!!!I am the main character!!!I'm not happy!Danmaku Amanojaku!!I'll capture it with cheat items right away!!Slap
But I'm feeling quite irritated, so first I'll go with
No Item!