why is this rape-face walrus-like creature a thing?
Because Bokukawauso was created by Warspite's voice actress, and it's been basically adopted into the the game.
Saaaam? I've got a biiit of a request for yoouu.What is it?Like this?Could I see you jump for just a bit?*boing*Too slow!!What IS that?...It's not....Waaaiiit!Hey, wait!
I don't want this a bit!
Take iiit!*fwip**fwop*A cute otter, isn't it?Eh?! What the?!
Is this this, a white bird thing?!...